Last week, I was feeling a bit depressed. I had overheard some news that made me downright sad about things that I couldn't change and because of certain circumstances, just had to live with it for the next few years. It reminded me of the time that my cousin told me the Easter bunny wasn't real. We were in the back of my parent's mini-van, heading to the park, when she told me. I was devastated..sure I suspected it was kind of weird how the Easter bunny just lays these eggs with candy and stickers inside..but somewhere deep and I mean really, really, deep, I just wanted to believe the Easter bunny existed and he came to visit my house and others too, on Easter Day. Anyway..the news wasn't something detrimental to my health or the health of my family, but it was sad news to process, especially when it was about people I trusted to do the right thing.
Luckily, I was charged up for a weekend get away at a religious education conference with my friend, Tiffany. I was thrilled after taking a class on five essential strategies to a joyful life by Father Joe Kempf. It was a great lecture that changed my outlook on life and the little problem I was having handling some negative news.
For today's RAK, I would like to share the notes I took on his lecture. Hope the lecture helps with any part of life that is getting you down.
Until tomorrow, share a little RAK wherever you go.
Christina
Session #1: You want me to be good all day? - Father Joe Kempf
Five Essential Strategies for a Truly Joyful Life:
1.) What % of your happiness depends on your circumstances?
Some people are more grateful than others. Is it because they are more blessed? Of course not.
10 Lepers parable: All were equally healed, but only one came back to say thank you. Where do we put our focus? Grateful people are those that have focused on their blessings. The more we look for stuff to complain about, the more we’ll find. The more we look for stuff to be grateful for, the more we’ll find.
Scientists suggest that 10% of our happiness depends on circumstances. Most of it has to do with our ATTITUDE. The good and the bad in life don’t cancel each other out. Our life is imperfect, we suffer great pain. What being grateful does: We do not deny those things, but we see the blessings that are right there.
The first way to nurture ourselves and our children is by practicing the art of gratitude thinking. It will make our life more meaningful. Practice it! Intentional about being a grateful person. Ex. Spend the first 15 minutes being grateful for what you have…during the summer. At first, you’re thinking when are the 15 min. going to be up..after only 6 min., but by end of summer, 15 min. will fly by because you learned how to be grateful.
Ex. about a sister with a learning disability. They tried an activity. Everytime the sisters talked, the sister without the disability would ask what is one good thing that happened today. Sister could sense something shifting inside of her disabled sister..because her sister could always find at least 1 good thing inside of her. Anyone who struggles w/depression..ask them to find just one good thing. Have them write their blessing in a gratitude journal. Each day, write down 3 things that you’re grateful. Following day, 3 different things you are grateful for. We forget how blessed we are.
Okay to grieve losses, don’t want to deny them. Just try to be aware of being aware of the blessings of what this moment hold.
The key to happiness is the practice of gratitude, being grateful.
2. Why do you exist?
The first sign of civilization was compassion.
Remember that our lives are not all about us. Don’t stop taking care of yourself or enjoy your blessings.
The secret to a miserable life is trying to find what will make us happy.
Favorite definition of motherhood: the incredible risk of having ½ your heart walk outside your body for the rest of your life. We all have a piece of a mother’s heart. Our lives are not all about us. Ex: your life is all about you – bombarded with advertisements. Must have special place for vulnerable, broken and poor. How you treat the poor?
You need to have a place in your heart for others.
We can’t get to heaven without a letter of recommendation from the poor.
The second way to a joyful life is to know that life is not all about us.
What’s the most important word of all: You.
Most important phrase: All of Us!
The way to make yourself miserable is to think that your life is all about you.
Essential discipline to a more joyful life – life is not about us.
3.) Who has hurt you?
Help me to forgive.
Ex. Drunk Driving accident that took life of daughter. I will have anger, but I will not have hatred. If I have hatred in my heart, the senseless act of violence has another victim. Determines the kind of person we are. With God’s help, we forgive.
To forgive does not mean to act as if no wrong has been done, or continue to stay in an abusive situation,. It is w/grace of God to pray for healing and peace, free from bitterness and hatred and not seek revenge.
To not forgive, causes untold damage. Why should one person’s senseless act claim another victim.
Although father misses his son terribly. Father knew what he had to do, to help set himself and the (drunk driver) person free. Father forgave the drunk driver.
The third habit that leads to meaningful and joyful life is to forgive.
Ex. Big Al (character in Father Kempf’s book) wants to clobber mean person, but Jesus wants you to forgive. Big Al idea, first clobber then forgive. Ask God to help you forgive.
4.) What do you worry about these days?
I know that you are with me, you will never go away. From morning to night, people are troubled. We worry. Ex. Pay mortgage, sound of a car that is different, conversation doesn’t go well.
Jesus says..do not worry. Do not worry about your life, what you will eat, what you will wear. Do not worry about it, yourself. Trust that God would be there for him, no matter how hard the time. To worry, robs us of life. Anxiety does not empty tomorrow of its trials, it simply empties the day of its job. Worry has this corrosive power that eats at our relationships. Just love right now, it’s all we have to do. We trust. It doesn’t mean that everything will be okay. No matter what life holds, we can be okay. Because love can be with each of us every step of the way. Jesus is not saying don’t plan for the future. He is saying live now, love now! Don’t live in the past..just live in the now. When anxiety comes, we don’t stay there..all we have to do is to love God. It’s all we can do.
Ex. Emily went back to Earth for one day. Sees a lot of worry in people’s faces. She wants to tell her dad that she has only one day to stay, but she can’t. She has to live life, liked she lived it. She just wants to hold her mom’s face and love her. Before she leaves, she wants to have just one more look. Goodbye world..mom, dad, clocks, mamas sunflowers, sleeping and waking up. Poor Earth, you are too wonderful for anyone to realized you.
Jesus says don’t worry, just love now.
Big Al is worried, that Fr. Kempf worries too much. Jesus says whenever you start to worry, just love more. Don’t worry, love now.
The prayers are from 2 different books of prayers: my sister is annoying and you want me to be good all day. Ligouri.org. WeloveBig Al.com.
5.) On what does your happiness depend?
It depends on things such as health, getting my way political or economically, do I have a job, am I succeeding, if my life turning out as I planned. Does happiness depend on external circumstances, does it depend on what others do to you.
Going through life..almost don’t want to be too happy. Because we got used to complaining and being the victim. We are each responsible for our own joy. No one can take it from us, no matter what anyone chooses around us. We can be happy. We can choose joy. Pain..until confronted from a different perspective.
You tube video: sometimes world will knock you down hard. You get back up. Don’t give up when you fall..even if it takes 102 tries. If you give up, you’re not going to get up. We all face limits. You will get up and you will be strong.
The truth is that we are responsible for our own joy. Doesn’t have to depend on anyone around us. Happiness is ultimately a decision. Give free reign to unhappiness..that we can be happy no matter what, we can choose joy.
People die, faith tells us that God is forever. We all face discouragements (ravages of time with our bodies, can’t find a job, etc.)..nothing can take away dignity and joy. We can choose to give them away, but no one can take those away from us. Faith tells us that we can be happy.
Choose Joy for a meaningful life.
The power of Christ is within all of us. We can choose joy. God comes disguised in our lives. Faith asks us a simple question. Do you choose to be happy?
Practice Gratitude
Life not all about us.
Forgive.
Don’t worry, love now.
Choose Joy.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
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